Stories

The animation I posted the other day with the triangles and circle and box, I saw that at a really cool lecture I went to over the weekend. The Heider-Simmel study was conducted back in the 1940's; most people, when watching this animation, explain "behavior" of the geometrical objects in a way that it fits into a social situation. Most people see in it complex interpersonal information with emotions without being prompted. Simply put, they see a story.

Here is what I, and most people, saw: little triangle (man) is with circle (woman), they are in love. Big triangle (second man) comes into the picture and tries to seduce circle - he tries to break up their relationship. For a while, it seems that big triangle succeeds: he manages to get circle into the room with him, corners her, but she doesn't give in, she keeps resisting. Eventually, little triangle (I, and Jeffrey Eugenides, thought this was a third man, most others seemed to have thought this one to be the original man) appears and circle happily leaves big triangle to run off with small triangle, and they live happily ever after.

The point of the lecture wasn't actually to look at a love triangle between triangles and a circle; rather, it was about the science of story telling (or the way it was phrased, The science of narrative - if you have some time, watch the children telling their stories, they are very cute and the stories rather interesting). Besides Jeffrey Eugenides, whose Middlesex is one of my favorite novels, Joyce Carol Oates was also on the panel. I have never actually read any of her writing, but have once worked with a doctor who went to Princeton as an undergrad, studied creative writing under her mentoring, and ended up publishing a couple of novels (before deciding to take the more lucrative career path of becoming a doctor). As a side-note, she also mentored Jonathan Safran Foer during his Princeton years, who, unlike my friend, very wisely decided to chose the less lucrative path to success, and aren't we all glad he did!

So, why do we tell stories? Is it an evolutionary adaptation, or maybe a byproduct of having too large brains? Does it have something to do with language or culture? What happens in our brains when we listen to stories? Do stories change us? These were just some of the issues being discussed at the panel, by the two novelists and three psychologists. Fascinating.

I love to read, and write. I mostly read stories about imaginary people (some about real people too) and write stories about or inspired by my own day to day life. For me, I used to think that these two activities serve different purposes. But maybe not. Sometimes I read as an escape; living in a story that is not my own life can be liberating. Sometimes, I want to identify with something, or someone, in a story. Reading about a person I feel I resemble makes me feel part of something. Sometimes, what I read changes my thinking, my behavior. One of the psychologists on the panel talked about the fact that people who read a lot of fiction are generally better at inter-personal communication, at identifying social cues; better at being social animals. Perhaps because so many social situations we would never encounter in our real lives are presented to us in stories.

Writing, for me, helps sort out convoluted thoughts in my head. Before something becomes ready to be written down, it needs to be organized, digested and comprehended. The myriad of thoughts and emotions that appear seemingly out of nowhere (or as a response to circumstances) can become very disruptive if not sorted through. At least that's what I have found since starting to write this blog. Something about the process of writing it all down (or out) reduces the confusion inside. The end result: I feel better! No better proof than the fact that I have been more or less consistently writing on here for years now. It also teaches me so much about myself. For example, just a moment ago, I wrote "I often have trouble keeping up new hobbies". Then I thought about that. Why do I think I have trouble keeping up new hobbies? Of the new new things I started doing over the last few years, I actually did keep up running, volunteering and writing regularly, which is not so bad. Sure, there are a few things I didn't follow up on: after going to Spain, I got very excited about learning Spanish, bought a few books, but never made it past the first chapter; for a while, I did yoga pretty regularly, which, over the past year or so, I could not keep up (maybe in med school I will need it more!). Sure, there are other things too, but overall, not so bad. I am not the kind of person who starts something, gets bored quickly, and quits. And I would have probably never thought about that unless I was writing about it.

There was also discussion at the lecture about why we often make up dark stories. One of the psychologists called it "trouble": stories always have some trouble element, he said.We, as a species, love apocalypse stories, war stories, stories of all kinds of hardships, murder mysteries, stories about people who get sick and so on. While I daydream - which is very often - I most often come up with stories that involve me in some future situation that's really rough. What if I was kidnapped by some foreign government and forced to become a spy for them (just one extreme example)? Apparently, imagining these difficult future situations prepares up for possible crazy things that could come up in life. It makes sense! Imagining an apocalypse, for example, people think of all kinds of different ways to deal with it - while, most likely we would all just be dead in case of one, but it's nice to imagine ourselves to be among the few survivors - and thus, might actually be better prepared in case it does come one day in the near future (like this year maybe!). I used to think there was something wrong with me, coming up with some crazy scenarios in my head, of the most unlikely of hardships I would encounter in the future. Apparently, most people do this! It's a relief, really.

I wish I had taken some writing classes in college, when I had a chance. I wish I had done many things differently in college, but oh well, I am just glad I didn't screw up any worse. At 18, one's just way too young to realize what an amazing opportunity it is to be able to take any class, learn anything at all, even if it's completely outside one's major. But maybe back then, I would not have been captivated by it; I could have been too immature. Maybe one day, I'll take a creative writing class, maybe with Joyce Carol Oates or Jeffrey Eugenides, wouldn't that be so cool??!!