Give or not to give

I read this somewhere the other day, cute and something to strive for:

"Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will stay awake just to watch you sleep... wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you're just as pretty without makeup on."

Something else I had been thinking about for some time. I think it was in one of Eckhart Tolle's books about finding inner peace and letting go of the frustrations caused by things outside of us; things we cannot control. It was about giving what is being taken away from us. For example - and I have tried this multiple times - if you are in line let's say at the grocery store and people are being inpatient and nasty, just give them extra patience and a smile instead of the gut reaction of being nasty back to them. Every time, I can tell the surprise in their expression. Maybe next time they interact with someone, they will remember that smile.

I have been trying to behave this way for the past few days with K. When I see him in the hallway at work - usually he would look at the floor, maybe give a nod, on good days, would mutter a barely laudable "hi" - I give him my nicest possible smile, say hi so that everyone around can hear and ask him how he is or how his day is going, or something generic like that but friendly. At first, I sensed the surprise: he had been acting nasty for weeks now and I had been reacting the same way, ignoring him, giving him mean looks, etc. When I first smiled and asked how he was a couple of days ago, he stopped for a moment, looked back and said "what's up". Then kept walking without waiting for the response. I thought "well, that's a start". Today, we were in the elevator together: I started talking to him in a very friendly manner and he responded like a completely normal person, as he would have done before anything had happened between us. And even though I don't at all care what he thinks about me or the situation or whether we will ever be friends again, but I feel so much better an so much more at peace. Just try giving something that another person is taking away from you and see what happens.