Just a few minutes ago, on my way home in the sprinkling rain, it occurred to me, completely out of nowhere, just how ridiculously good my life is. I know I complain a lot, it's hard to always have this perspective - maybe it's hormonal anyway? - but I thought I had to record this now before I forgot how I was feeling today.
I thought: I am a student who gets paid to go to school, to live in Manhattan and to work in a field of science incredibly exciting (even though sometimes it doesn't feel that way on a daily bases) and to travel to conferences like the one I just returned from last night. I got to spend 4 days among the smartest people in my field and then discover a city I had never been to before. I listened to a lecture by a Nobel Laureate - David Baltimore - and one from someone who many say will win the price in the coming years. I tried oysters for the first time in my life, saw the sunset over a gorgeous bay, got to look down on a city from a Space Needle built for a World Fair, got to stay in a really nice and expensive hotel, again, all paid for by my school to learn more about science.
I live in one of the most vibrant cities in the world. In my free time I run around lakes and parks, play with swords, add talk about life and love with friends one can only hope for. As I was walking home after having a beer with one of these incredible friends, I just couldn't help but smile. I even thought for a moment that I liked the rain even though it's making my hair really puffy and it got my canvas shoes all wet but it was so shiny and cool on my skin.
Maybe there was something in my beer...
My thought was interrupted right there at the beer having been spiked with something. I think my roomie had come in my room and we started chatting and then I must have gotten tired. I am really happy actually to have thought of this because things have been great with her recently: we have been talking a lot more and hanging out, both at home and out making plans, watching movies, or just eating lunch together sitting on our beds. I missed this so much! Makes an enormous difference to come home to find a friend I can talk to and spend time with.
Ah, another weekend flew by. Race #4 of the NY running season down. 10K, usual Central Park route, usual rainy start, actually, it poured for about the first 2 miles, then the whole park was flooded and my shoes were filled with water for the entire race. I also decided in the morning to put sunscreen on (God knows why, I must have still been asleep) and for the first 20 minutes of the race, it was dripping into my eyes and I could barely see a thing. Of course, this is probably not why I ended up a minute slower than a few weeks ago. I was trying not to kill myself. Next up: Boston half marathon next Sunday. I am nervous about it, not at all ready. If I think about it, I am actually never really ready for any of these races. I realize now that to be a really serious runner is like having another job. All the time and effort that goes into running 5-6 times a week is just impossible next to grad school. But I never set out to be one of those runners. I just want to be in really good shape, feel good and release stress. I think I can do that in 3-4 times a week. And if my half marathon time stay around 2 hours, who cares?
Much of rest of the weekend I spent doing nothing (finally a relaxing day!!) and running errands and now I am exhausted.
Can I ever catch up with myself?
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